Olethros
10-30-2008, 10:07 AM
We interrupt your regularly scheduled message board browsing to bring you breaking news from Irvine, CA. Recently declassified documents have sent the town reeling with theories and speculation. The key issue seems to revolve around an employee of AtlusUSA who goes by the handle Manly Biceps. It would appear that Mr. Biceps has a somewhat curious past. Previous to the year 2005, there appears to be no known records of this individual. However, there are several references to a Girly Biceps. From ’05 to ’07, there’s a void. No records of anyone named Biceps appears. Then, in ’07 surfaces our afore mentioned Manly. What does this mean? Several theories from top analysts around the country have begun to surface in an attempt to explain this phenomenon. These range from hormone therapies to anabolic steroids. The most outlandish claims that a two year stint in the state pen gave Biceps the time to pump iron and make some…ahem…intimate companions. While his handlers have refused to allow us to speak to Mr. Biceps, proclaiming rage issues, we did manage to get statements form several individuals close to this story:
Inzaghi: Manly Biceps? I’m here 26 hrs a day, 8 days a week doing my damned best to make anthropomorphic bears and the color yellow cool, and you want to talk about him? Screw you guys. I’m the rock star here. Now leave me alone, I need to come up with something that rhymes with beariffic…
Onion of Mystery: Excellent! Now, while you’re all distracted with him I’ll be free to find my next vict..er, um,…best friend forever. Yeah, that’s it, BFF. Mwah-ha-ha-ha.
Purple Dragon: :yawn:………………………………………………………………………
White Rob: Yo-yo-yo, wuts the dizzle? Haz I convizzled yall that Iz a Cracka yet? C’mon dog, my name is White Rob, get it? WHITE!
AtlasA.R.A.M.: Meatbag gender does not concern A.R.A.M. Meatbags exist only to service A.R.A.M.’s oil.
Mumu: I’M NOT INZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rednusander: I had it all. The money. The fame. The power. I was a Mod! Curse you Inzaghi!!!!!!1
Kakizaki: Dude, chill. I understand how big a story this is and all, but as soon as you’re done I’m going to go into edit and soften it up a bit, OK?
Chibilemonchan: hey. HEY. Where ya goin’? What do you mean you don’t know who I am? Hey, I’m talking to you….
ElectrolyteJunky: MB? Yeah, we used to work out together. Strangest thing, while I was downing Gatorades he was heading out back with two guys, baby oil, and a syringe.
That’s all we currently have here from Irvine. Rest assured, faithful, that as this story continues to unfold we be there to keep you informed! We now return you to your regularly scheduled browsing.
(The preceding has been a paid public service announcement of Arlus incorporated. The views and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of AtlusUSA or any of its known affiliates)
Inzaghi: Manly Biceps? I’m here 26 hrs a day, 8 days a week doing my damned best to make anthropomorphic bears and the color yellow cool, and you want to talk about him? Screw you guys. I’m the rock star here. Now leave me alone, I need to come up with something that rhymes with beariffic…
Onion of Mystery: Excellent! Now, while you’re all distracted with him I’ll be free to find my next vict..er, um,…best friend forever. Yeah, that’s it, BFF. Mwah-ha-ha-ha.
Purple Dragon: :yawn:………………………………………………………………………
White Rob: Yo-yo-yo, wuts the dizzle? Haz I convizzled yall that Iz a Cracka yet? C’mon dog, my name is White Rob, get it? WHITE!
AtlasA.R.A.M.: Meatbag gender does not concern A.R.A.M. Meatbags exist only to service A.R.A.M.’s oil.
Mumu: I’M NOT INZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rednusander: I had it all. The money. The fame. The power. I was a Mod! Curse you Inzaghi!!!!!!1
Kakizaki: Dude, chill. I understand how big a story this is and all, but as soon as you’re done I’m going to go into edit and soften it up a bit, OK?
Chibilemonchan: hey. HEY. Where ya goin’? What do you mean you don’t know who I am? Hey, I’m talking to you….
ElectrolyteJunky: MB? Yeah, we used to work out together. Strangest thing, while I was downing Gatorades he was heading out back with two guys, baby oil, and a syringe.
That’s all we currently have here from Irvine. Rest assured, faithful, that as this story continues to unfold we be there to keep you informed! We now return you to your regularly scheduled browsing.
(The preceding has been a paid public service announcement of Arlus incorporated. The views and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of AtlusUSA or any of its known affiliates)